The Term Narcissism I Heard About It Or Read About It In My Mid 20´s When I Had Already Lived In Germany For More Than Ten Years, And The Reason I Came About It Was To Try To Understand My Husband´s Behaviour. He Was Acting Like My Mother Whom I Came To Learn That She Was A Narcissist.
Before I Could Start Looking For Answers I Had Been Through Hell I Even Believed I Was Born With A Curse, I Had Been Abused Since I Set My Eyes Onto This World. Since I Was A Child I Had Been Physically And Emotional Abused By Mother, Teachers, Neighbors, Family Members And Authority Figures Which Made Me Ran Away From Home At The Age Of 16.
Two Years Down The Line Of Being Homeless I Met A Man Who Promised Me Everything I Had Longed For, It Was Just Too Nice To Be True But How Was I Suppose To Know All Of That, I Was Just Eighteen Unexperienced And Naive.
I Married The Love Of My Life But I Was Being Hurt Emotionally But Couldn´t Find The Words To Describe What I Was Feeling Because If There Is Someone Who Knows How To Mess With Your Feelings Then A Narcissist. You Know That Something Isn´t Right But You Can´t Put Your Fingers On It, Some Emotional Abuse I Was Going Through Was Hard For Me To Even Realise What Just Happened Because It Would Be Done In A Teasing Way Which Left Me Confused Most Of The Time.
The Abuse Started Having A Toll On Me And So I Started Acting Out, Not Only Was I Being Abused By My Husband But By Other People Too And Once I Started To Defend Myself They Said That Am Aggressive And Psychophrenic, And So They Put Me In A Psychiatrie For Eight Months While They Inject And Give Me Medication By Force.
Multiple Examination Were Done With Me. I Was Beaten, Threatened, I was Crucified In Bed And Given Multiple Injections, I Was Starved And Sexually Abused In Psychiatry. I Was Told It Is Either I Do What They Told Me To Do Like Taking My Medication Or I Will Never See My Son Again Who Was Only Months Old At That Time.
Time Has Passed And I Don´t Recognise My Child I Don´t Know What They Did To Him, I Live In Fear I Can Not Even Go To Work For Fear Of Being Bullied At Work. I Don´t Go Outside Often For Fear Of Being Harassed By Police, I Get Stared Alot By Strangers And If I Try To Defend Myself The Police Are Being Called On Me Then Am Handcuffed And Taken To Psychiatry.
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